Applied Pessimism

Panel 1: 19.00000 Seminar in Applied Pessimism The mathematician (in front of a blackboard: You are stupid): Today, class, we'll talk about the political pessimism postulate Panel 2: The mathematician: Let's face it, you fail. You're clumsy at everything especially driving. You can't drive when you do drive, it makes people sad. Or angry. It's just bad. Panel 3: The mathematician (voice-over): Therefore, since you'll just annoy people with your lousy driving, you should put bumper stickers on your car for the candidates you don't support. A car: &*(#$@ Another car (with 5 straight, parallel arrows and 1 zigzag arrow): wheeeeeeee!!! Panel 4: On the blackboard: N ≡ a₁ (mod p₁) N ≡ a₂ (mod p₂) The mathematician: Next class, we'll discuss whether the U.S. should boycott the chinese remainder theorem.

The best trolling tool ever would be a holographic campaign bumper sticker that changed candidates depending on whether you looked at it from the right side or the left. For bonus confusion points you could mix and match presidential and vice presidental candidates from different parties.

Applied Pessimism

2 May 2008